With fingernails that shine like justice
And a voice that is dark like tinted glass
Recent Entries 
10th-Mar-2009 11:31 am - Exception
i wanna feel boat
The exception to the rule......



This time I have no idea what to do.

As one of my best friend's put it, "he's like your Big...the guy you never will get over".


Yeah.

slow dancing tight
my barren heart and i
your name used to taste so sweet
then you beat the love right out of me
it's a mystery how people behave!
how we long for a life as a slave
when he kissed me i gladly gave in
to a fight nobody could win

man, he left me blue
and if i could i would do it too
i tell you now like i told you before
love is a powerful force
and it's a mystery how people behave!
how we long for a life as a slave
and tumble into any open arms
that will only ever do you harm

oh, you you it's always you
5th-Feb-2009 12:26 pm - TAPS
breathe me
I am devastated...





The Superintendent regrets to inform the VMI community of the death this morning of Colonel William J. Stockwell, Acting Deputy Superintendent and Dean of the Faculty.

Colonel Stockwell began work at VMI January 1, 1975, as an instructor in the Physical Education Department and rose to full professor of physical education, remaining with the department until his promotion to associate dean in 1994. He served as acting dean of the faculty for the 2000 – 2001 academic year, and has served as the Deputy Superintendent for Academics and Dean of the Faculty for the current academic year. A 1974 graduate of Springfield College, Colonel Stockwell earned his doctorate in health education from the University of Virginia in 1984. In 1986 he received VMI’s Thomas Jefferson Distinguished Teaching Award.

Colonel Stockwell is survived by his wife, Jill, daughter, Jaclyn, and sons, Robert and Bredt. Funeral arrangements are pending at the Harrison Funeral Home & Crematory, Lexington, Virginia.

Counselors are available this afternoon in the Turman Room of Preston Library to offer assistance to cadets, faculty, or staff members. A location for counseling services tomorrow will be communicated later.

[http://op-for.com/2009/02/rip_colonel_stockwell.html]


As the local news put it:
VMI says its Dean of Faculty, and Acting Deputy Superintendent is dead.

The Rockbridge County Sheriff’s Office is investigating the death of Colonel William J. Stockwell.

VMI says Col. Stockwell began his work at the instutute back in 1975. Stockwell started off as an instructor in the physical education department, then rose to full professor.

In 1994, VMI promoted Stockwell to associate dean.

Stockwell served as acting dean of the faculuty for the 2000 – 2001 academic year, and has served as the Deputy Superintendent for Academics and Dean of the Faculty for the current academic year, according to VMI.

Col. Stockwell earned his doctorate in health education from UVA in 1984.

He is survived by his wife, Jill, daughter, Jaclyn, and sons, Robert and Bredt.

Funeral arrangements are pending according to VMI.


I am not going to post on here what I know about his death because I don't want it to surface in any web searches. I will say, however, that I am devastated and shocked, and I am so grateful that my Grandmother is their neighbor in many respects so she can be a matronly presence for Jill in this time of HORRIFIC thoughts and nightmarish feelings. I am so incredibly upset. This death is one of the most unexpected, and he is the #6 father to die of my friends who I have known my entire life from being in pre-school with them. And that statistic makes me feel sick to my stomach. This incredibly genial man was probably one of the first people I ever had a crush on, I think I used to consider him dreamy because he had long eyelashes (as all of his kids, incl his sons, have) and a really nice smile. He and Jill were the most tolerant of parents. When we would all swim together at the club, I feel like their presence was so accepted by all the adults esp. when we kids would be dropped off for the day and ran amock all the time. We would be ridiculous and rambunxious and they would both deal with it. We would share cheese sticks and sodas and hot dogs and sometimes even the Stockwell's would treat us all to some snacks. Jill was an assistant in pre-school at the pre-school our original group of, I'd say 15 went to together. She and Bill made the most gorgeous couple. Tall, athletic, blond and light-brown hair, long eyelashes - just an All-American couple - and not the sketchy Stepford kind either. Robby was in my class... our entire life until we both went to boarding school. Jaclyn was a couple years younger, and then Bredt was the unexpected surprise for us fringe insiders. But they are all beautiful and they are/were a beautiful family.

I cannot imagine losing my father. If my father died unexpectedly, I would likely PLUMMET into a deep depression and I cannot wrap my head around that thought. Yikes. I just wish ...I don't know. I am still wrapping my head around this entire situation.

Very sad day. : (
16th-Jan-2009 12:41 pm - Eggs?
GS - Sam is happy
This is kind-of major


I am going through the process of deciding whether or not to donate my eggs.

Not, on a permanent basis, but as I have at least another 2 years of education before Michael and I could consider having children, I could be helping someone in fulfilling their life's dreams.

...what is so wonderful is that Michael is completely supportive of whatever decision I make - and I think that this is one that is good both in a spiritual sense as well as the mental and physical benefits - i.e. it is such a good thing to do for other people! To know you are consciously helping people with things from inside you would really motivate me with my health habits my doctors are encouraging me to continue on a more intense level...


Would love input.
8th-Jan-2009 01:55 pm - Weird.
OC - lonely
Going back there just stirs a lot of old stuff up.

In a good way.

But then I also think about a lot of the "what if's"

They intoxicate my thoughts.
8th-Jan-2009 01:10 pm - wow
TWW - amyjosh1
January 1, 2004:


Wwj369: right. but i'm so ready to go back to school to show how much i'm ready to prove myself to everyone.
Wwj369: no, not really. in the long run i think i would be relieved
Wwj369: i would rather be totally ignored, then used as a tool to cure boredom
Wwj369: that's just stupid



Insane amounts of irony. So much it hurts. Even if it is in the past.
4th-Jan-2009 12:39 pm - Presents...
TWW - amyjosh1
From Michael:
Sewing Machine
2 books - The Duchess of Devonshire (the one that inspired the movie) and American Wife
spa day at Red Door
Origins Ginger collection
Origins Checks and Balances face wash


From Grandmama and Grandpapa:
Coach purse [fo' realz]


From Gaga and Pappy:
Green and Pink ribbon belt
Herbes de Provence jar

From my cousin Arianna:
Sterling Silver case engraved with my initials that has a contact lens case inside and two mini bottles to put solution in- plus a mirror in the lid! VERY AWESOME (Morgan & Company, look them up)

From the Woolfs:
Gossip Girl Season 1

From Mike's family:
Lemon and Lavendar Yankee Candle (Lauren)
3 boxes of tea (Bob and Nancy, Mike's parents)
a tea cup and saucer (Grandmother)

Susan (his best friend who is a ladyyyy):
Embarassingly awful picture of Michael from before he met me. Yikes!!

From Mom and Dad:
Gold Anchor Earrings from Calista Cove
Herbes de Provence
Dark Chocolate
5 headbands - brown leather woven, black leather, pink plaid Baekgaard, green floral, red with bow
L.L. Bean Boat & Tote bag with long handles, zip-top, forest green top, bottom, and handles with natural bag color. Monogrammed in Script with WWJ
W&L Bookstore: Pink tunic-dress with sweatshirt material with W&L trident in white on the bottom corner
Vase for Michael and I

And other little things...

My brother:
iPod Touch - AMAZING!!!
10th-Nov-2008 07:47 pm(no subject)
TWW - amyjosh1
I greatly dislike my health issues

Hospitals suck.
10th-Nov-2008 07:46 pm - Balaliaikas Ringing...
TWW - amyjosh1
RORY: He's doing something.

LOGAN: Good. Fine. He's doing something. Everybody in the world's doing something. More power to him.

RORY: I'm not. I mean, what am I doing? I'm living with my grandparents.

LOGAN: That's temporary. Have a drink.

RORY: Temporary can turn into forever.

LOGAN: You're not living with the Gilmore’s forever.

RORY: I'm palling with my grandmother and being waited on by a maid. I come home, and my shoes are magically shined. My clothes are magically clean, ironed, and laid out. My bed is magically turned down. I'm in the DAR? I'm going to meetings and teas and cocktail parties?

LOGAN: Again, temporary. Have a drink.

RORY: And wasting my time partying and drinking, just hanging out doing nothing.

LOGAN: Whoa, whoa, whoa. (he gets up) Don't pull me into this.

RORY: I didn't say anything about you.

LOGAN: Yes, you did. Don't make me feel guilty for your drinking and partying. That's your choice. I'm not forcing you. When I ask you out, you can say no.

RORY: It's all we do.

LOGAN: It's not all we do.

RORY: It's all you do.

LOGAN: Well, it's my prerogative, you know. You're damn straight. I'm gonna party. I'm gonna do it while I have the chance because come June, my life is over.

RORY: Oh, yes, your horrible life. Let's hear about it.

LOGAN: Got a week?

RORY: You have every door open to you. You have opportunities that anyone would kill for, including me.

LOGAN: No one's stopping you from making whatever you want happen. Go into journalism. Go into politics. Be a doctor. Be a clown. Do whatever you want.

RORY: It's not as easy when it's not handed to you.

LOGAN: Really? It's all so easy for me? (getting upset) I don't want that life. It's forced on me. You talk about all these doors being open? All I see is one door, and I'm being pushed through it. I have no choice. You try living without options.

RORY: How hard are you fighting it?

LOGAN: I didn't tell you to quit Yale. You did that. I gave you one month, you went beyond that month, and it had nothing to do with me. It was all you. Now, you want to change? Change it, but don't blame me. Don't you dare blame me.
31st-Oct-2008 08:13 pm - this is me
TWW - amyjosh1
This is me... mostly.








Everytime I watch this it brings me back to Macon and the night in my life that changed every choice I have made up to that point.
24th-Sep-2008 12:28 pm - you know you love me...
atonement - bw kiss
I have sold out myself to the world of Blogger. Yes, I know, it's tragic. I may occasionally update on here. But I am going for a less-personal blog and a more fashion-slash-tv-slash-generalized blog.

http://worthingtonstyle.blogspot.com


xo
12th-Sep-2008 09:12 am - Time for some Campaignin'
TWW - amyjosh1
Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!
5th-Sep-2008 10:52 am - Shameless Promotion!
TWW - amyjosh1
Hey all - Happy Friday! Some shameless promotion here - would LOVE for all of you faboo friends to check out my Aunt Gail's website - she does jewelry, art, manuscripts, and glass pieces. Very talented! Check it out at: http://www.gailsart.com

xo
Whit
5th-Sep-2008 09:17 am - Gossip Girl spoilers
TWW - amyjosh1
From Entertainment Weekly...Spoilers on the new season of Gossip Girl,

 

under the cut: )
4th-Sep-2008 11:22 am - I'm back
TWW - amyjosh1
Okay, well, now that I am mentally recovered from losing a music idol who I had grown up with knowing well, I am back on track...


Recently went shopping with Mike to Short Pump mall, LOVE my subscription to Lucky because it includes those delish coupons from stores - got to use my Ann Taylor LOFT ones so here is the loot I got:



Striped Ruffle-Button-Down Shirt. $46.00
Hello I want to follow the "ruffle" trend of Fall without looking like a pirate!! and continuing my classic-preppy-with-an-edge style. This does it perfectly with it's wide, delicate ruffle down the front and around the collar, long classic dress shirt sleeves, and narrow, miniscule pinstripe pattern! Yay!





Crewneck Cardigan. $39.50.
I mostly bought this cardigan because I really enjoyed the style, found it significantly comfortable (I'm a 32D bra so I hate the buttons pulling look), and found it incredibly soft. I love the kind-of pearl polish of the buttons! It is great to layer with and have worn it 2x now, so I am thinking I may go back and buy it in a few more colors. I have it in grey, but it also comes in red, pink, orange, yellow, green, black and brown!


Michael and I are still doing faboo. We are big into staying-at-home-cooking-and-drinking routine. It's mostly because he works, yes, in the same building as me, but we maybe see each other once a workday. Also, he has a parking spot in the building, unlike me, so we cannot ride into work together (prohibited by federal regulations for his position), he trains 3x a week - Monday, Weds, and now Fridays and sometimes even Saturdays.

If I haven't explained it before, Mike is a purple belt in Jiu-jitsu from a Gracie school, has studied Muay Thai, and participates occasionally in Jiu-jitsu or MMA tournaments. He is incredibly skilled and regimental in his training from his military background and you wouldn't know it if you looked at him. I mean, you look at him and see him as a law enforcement guy, but you wouldn't be able to tell that he could break you in half. ha.


Anyway, so we like to spend time at home just cooking and hanging out. Especially now that I have started Paralegal School! Woohoo! So I am doing that 2 nights a week in Richmond and loving it. The classes are great and so are the teachers. I am really glad I chose this program to further my job prospects, etc. It's nice being back in a program where I am one of the "smart kids". I think there is no reason I shouldn't get an A in pretty much every class I take! I should be done with the degree in Spring of 2010!


Back to cooking:


Here is a recipe Michael made for me one night:


My Pretzel-Crusted Chicken Breasts, published in Rachael Ray 365: No Repeats


Ingredients
2 tablespoons butter
2 tablespoons flour
½ cup chicken broth
½ cup milk
8 ounces shredded sharp cheddar cheese
2 tablespoons spicy brown mustard
Salt and pepper
One 12-ounce bag whole grain pretzels
2 teaspoons dried thyme
4 large eggs
2 pounds of chicken breasts (4 small ones is easier but 2 large pieces worked fine for Mike and I)
¾ cup extra-virgin olive oil (EVOO)


Directions
1. Melt the butter in a saucepan over medium heat. Whisck in the flour and cook for 1minute, then whisk in the chicken broth and milk. When the milk begins to bubble, stir in the cheese and mustard. Season the sauce with salt and pepper; remove from the heat and cover to keep warm.
2.Preheat the oven to 250F. Using a food processor, finely grind the pretzels. Transfer to a shallow bowl and add the thyme. In another shallow bowl, beat the eggs. Coat the chicken with the pretzel crumbs, then the egg, then the pretzel crumbs again.
3.In a large skillet, heat ½ cup olive oil over medium heat. Cook the chicken in 2 batches, turning, until firm, about 3 minutes on each side. Drain on paper towels; keep warm on a baking sheet in the oven.


Yummy!


Here is a recipe I did the other night when it was an unexpected 66 degrees outside and raining!! PERFECT for when it gets to be cooler. I think Mike would've enjoyed it more with a beer (the flavor is a bit dull, like Chinese dumplings?)


RICOTTA GNUDI IN PARMESAN BROTH from Everyday Pasta by Giada De Laurentiis
nude. That's the translation of gnudi, which describes this pasta filling without the pasta wrapper.


PARMESAN BROTH
6 cups low-sodium chicken broth
1 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
1/4 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese


RICOTTA GNUDI
21/2 cups whole-milk ricotta cheese (I used 3 cups because I thought it needed more cheesiness)
1/2 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese
1 egg
1 egg white
2 ounces prosciutto, chopped
2 tablespoons chopped, fresh flatleaf parsley
1/4 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour, plus 1 cup for dredging


Bring the chicken broth to a boil in a medium saucepan over high heat. Reduce the heat to medium-low and simmer until the broth has reduced to 4 cups, about 20 minutes.
Meanwhile, make the gnudi. Bring a large pot of salted water to a simmer over high heat. In a large bowl, combine the ricotta, Parmesan, egg, egg white, prosciutto, parsley, nutmeg, salt, and pepper and mix thoroughly. When the water is simmering and ready, stir the flour into the ricotta mixture. (It is important not to add the flour too soon; otherwise they will become dense and gummy, not light.)
Shape the gnudi using two large soup spoons; scoop up a large spoonful of ricotta mixture into one spoon, then onto the other spoon and back again, forming a three-sided oval. Drop the gnudi into the dredging flour. Form another 8 or 9 gnudi at a time, dredge in flour on all sides, and tap off the excess.
Slide the formed gnudi into the simmering water, being careful not to overcrowd the pot. Remove the gnudi using a slotted spoon after they have floated to the top and have cooked for about 4 minutes total.
While the gnudi cook, create another batch of gnudi and dredge them in flour. Continue cooking and forming gnudi, transferring the cooked gnudi to a platter in a single layer, until you have used all the ricotta mixture. Divide the gnudi among the serving bowls. Pour the reduced broth over the gnudi. Sprinkle with a pinch of the pepper and a spoonful of grated Parmesan and serve.


Relationships. Well, things have been rather fantastic for me lately, although I have still been having a hard time making time to spend with GFs and BFFs, etc. I am trying really hard to prioritize. I make sure to phone visit with both of my parents at LEAST once a week, even just send a quick text, email, or voicemail to a GF/BFF who I haven't seen a while but miss a ton, and keep work and school balanced. Shwew! I am doing all I can to not wipe out! But it is all worth it, I like being busy, I like having responsibilities. I just bought tickets on pre-sale to see Nine Inch Nails (I know, weird for me, right?) with my friend Emily (if she can't go I will likely invite Isabel!) in November, and Isabel and I are thinking we may do First Fridays around town with all of the galleries after work tomorrow. It is pretty fantastico, if you ask me!


I never thought I would get where I am with Michael, mostly because I was so far involved with Adam and so interested in John. Weird how things turn out, but definitely for the best. I know I have said it a dozen times but it still rings true!! Everyday I am grateful for the things I chose to do or not do, so I was able to get here and start my relationship with Michael. : )


On to more trivial things:


Gossip Girl was ehh. I loved the clothing as usual, adored Blair's poolside retro-glam bathing suit, and loved the new slang "motherChucker" and "Basshole", and was glam things were so cheesy for the end of the Season Premiere. But I hope things get better, because this "I am a Lord" bit is kind-of random and I don't want Season 2 of GG to be like Season 3 of The O.C. (weird, random, and WTF with all of the excess drama).


The Hills. Okay, lets actually have a storyline on Heidi and Spencer if you are going to include them. Come onnnn. And the Whitney storyline is just as disjointed. Can we please have some coverage of Lo not being a huge bitch and Audrina not being slung around like a purse. And Stephanie is so fugly. What was her problem back in the day? Her face tells me it may have been meth, because she just doesn't seem happy unless she is COVERED in makeup. Good golly.


90210. Didn't see it. Hello, RNC to watch.


GREEK! So glad the show is back. I am totally addicted. And I love how accurate all the Greek-i-ness is. It's quite adorable, but I really wish Casey would stop getting screwed over. Cappie and Rebecca still weird me out, but I can handle it when Rebecca isn't being too nice or too obnoxious. I like her natural bitchy self!

2nd-Sep-2008 09:36 am - Back!
OC - listens to love songs
Okay, post-LeRoi Moore funeral and Labor Day holiday weekend - back in the office. Will do a fresh post today or tomorrow, promise!! xoxo
26th-Aug-2008 04:10 pm - one sweet world...
TWW - amyjosh1
Went to LeRoi's visitation today.

Wow.
20th-Aug-2008 09:04 am - the dreaming tree has died
TWW - amyjosh1
I will be M.I.A. for a few days... so so so hard to believe.






Standing here
The old man said to me,
"Long before these crowded streets
Here stood my dreaming tree."
Below it he would sit
For hours at a time
Now progress takes away
What forever took to find
And now he's falling hard
He feels the falling dark
How he longs to be
Beneath his dreaming tree

Conquered fear to climb
A moment froze in time
When the girl who first he kissed
Promised him she'd be his
Remembered mother's words
There beneath the tree
"No matter what the world
You'll always be my baby."
"Mommy come quick,
The dreaming tree has died."
The air is growing thick
A fear he cannot hide
The dreaming tree has died

Oh, have you no pity?
This thing I do
I do not deny it
All through this smile
As crooked as danger
I do not deny
I know in my mind
I would leave you now
If I had the strength to
I would leave you up
To your own devices
Will you not talk?
Can you take pity?
I don't ask much
But won't you speak, please?

From the start
She knew she had it made
Easy up 'til then
For sure she'd make the grade
Adorers came in hordes
To lay down in her wake
Gave it all she had
But treasures slowly fade
Now she's falling hard
Feels the fall of dark
How did this fall apart?
She drinks to fill it up
A smile of sweetest flowers
Wilted so and soured
Black tears stain the cheeks
That once were so admired
She thinks when she was small
There on her father's knee
How he had promised her,
"You'll always be my baby."
"Daddy come quick,
The dreaming tree has died
I can't find my way home
There is no place to hide
The dreaming tree has died."

Oh, if I had the strength to
I would leave you up
To your own devices
Will you not talk?
Can you take pity?
I don't ask much
But won't you speak, please?
TWW - amyjosh1

Michael and I had a lovely weekend at home. Well, he was at home on Friday, while I worked (lucky him, so much use-or-lose government Annual Leave!) - but while filing and doing my normal thing I ordered from JCrew some things I had been holding off on getting all Spring/Summer from JCrew. So I saved a TON of money and got them over the weekend:

Got the skirt in Soft Fuschia and the Super 120s similar skirt in black:


Sea Foam Treasures Bracelet!:



Sand-Dollar Necklace:



And the Darla Shift in the Brilliant Blue:



Yay! Happy Birthday to Me. Basically the money I spent on this is the money I unexpectedly saved from buying my lone TWO textbooks for this Fall. I had saved up double the amount for textbooks thinking each course would require at least one book and that was not the case. Yay!!

13th-Aug-2008 09:07 am - *snicker*
TWW - amyjosh1
gi ggle giggle giggle:

This is probably my favorite Gawker post ever --- reading of the comments is obligatory as it is Open Caption:


http://gawker.com/tag/open-caption/?i=377036&t=this-meeting-of-the-lemoncake-stupid-society-is-adjourned
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